Dear Alfred Angelo

I hate you. I am tired of spending $140 on dresses that do not come in my size. I am tired of paying women to try and bring them in for me only to fail once again. You can't turn these dresses into my size. You just can't. I waste my money. I look odd in all the pictures. And I spend yet another wedding uncomfortable, seams poking me in odd places, dresses constantly needing to be pulled up. It's ridiculous. Would it really cost you that much more money to just sell the dang thing in my size?? 

No one at my wedding will ever wear Alfred Angelo. Not ever. Never never never. And I'm sure I will be able to fit into his dresses by then but I don't care, this is an issue of principal now.