Happy Valentine's Day!

The problem with a huge paper being due February 16th is that we all wait until the weekend before to do it, and February 14th is a day that the tv is swarmed with everyone's favorite romantic movies. Right now I'm watching Love Actually, one of my favorites. 

Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion's starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often, it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it's always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaking suspicion... love actually is all around. 

The funny thing is, when our plane landed in Frankfurt, and Luna and I took off to get our bags, there was a little old man waiting right there next to the baggage claim. He was obviously looking for someone, and that someone was obviously not involved in our huge group of people. A young girl in her 20s with red hair and hippie clothes jumped out from behind our group and gave the older gentleman a big hug. He told his daughter, perhaps granddaughter, how much he had missed her and how happy he was to see her at last, it had just been too long. My first thought was Love Actually's opening lines. There is so much love in the world and we just don't see it, sometimes we just don't open our eyes and notice it, but it is all around. 

Whether it's family reuniting at an airport 

or if it's 16 year olds holding hands at the mall, 

20 somethings celebrating the birth of their first child, 

or ancient wrinkled love birds sitting in a park together it is certainly and blatantly everywhere, sometimes we are just too stubborn to see it, it's a choice we have to make, and I think it's the choice between optimism and pessimism. 

Happy Valentine's Day! 

Little Audrey Marie

Two years ago I was lucky enough to get to see Ashley and Andrew get married, (even if it may not have been the least stress-free situation in which to meet the BF's entire family for the very first time...) and I feel so fortunate that I was able to see their marriage culminate in something so beautiful!

 The BF and I went to go see this little bundle tonight and what a beautiful baby! I was so excited when the BF asked me to go visit with him. Babies generally make me nervous, I'm great with little kids, but babies I just don't know what to do with. Since Audrey was born though, I've been so pumped to meet her, and she didn't let down. Everything about her is so tiny and soft and perfect. Now it makes more sense to me why my friends are always cooing at babies when we walk past them in restaurants and stores : ) It's amazing to think that something so tiny turns in to a grown up one day.

Anyway, congratulations to the very happy little family! I know a thousand people have already told you this, (I heard three people say it tonight!) but you guys do great work! You made a beautiful little girl! Congratulations!

Also, kudos to me for holding my first newborn! Snaps for Char!

Forever 21 Never Fails Me

I want these boots so bad. Now.

Now, black or brown...?

*Update* Definitely brown...

This is Very Random

Going into my senior year of high school I was completely set on what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. I was going to go to Purdue, major in Fashion Merchandising, spend my senior year in NYC at the Fashion Institute of Technology, and carry on with a career probably as a buyer for an upscale department store. Ya know, like Rachel did on Friends... But two high school teachers said things to me my senior year that completely changed everything. 

One day my spanish teacher (Mr. E., everyone's absolute favorite teacher) was talking to us about when he ran into an ex student of his, I think his name was Ben, and if it wasn't, it is now. Anyway, Ben was the big time manager at some store and when he saw 

Mr. E. he said something to the affect of, "Aren't you proud of me, I made it." Mr. E. then proceeded to tell us that, actually he wasn't at all proud of him. Ben wasn't doing anything to help people, he was just bossing people around, basically wasting his life. That stuck with me. Everyone wants to impress the cool teacher. Automatically I thought about all the times I had enthusiastically described to him how much I loved fashion, how I started sketching designs in 5th grade, and was so excited to spend a year at FIT. I was so worried, I was sure he thought I was a disappointment, a waste of his teaching skills. What does fashion do to help people?

After that I started to doubt things. I went and talked to my favorit

e teacher, everyone else's least favorite, Mrs. S. She was my history and english teacher and I absolutely loved her, she was such a genius and the first teacher who seemed to feel that my ending a sentence with a preposition didn't matter as long as it fit the situation. In fact, she seemed to like my preposition-ending sentences better than my friends' by the book "firstly, secondly, thirdly, and in conclusion" paragraphs. When I went to her she pointed me to history. She said I had a knack for it, and also brought up to me that a fashion career would lead me to a city and did I really want to raise children in a city? Hmm. For some reason it didn't strike me at the time at half of my town commuted the hour drive to Chicago everyday so I definitely would not have had to raise kids in the city, but regardless. Then Manchester started sending me money and they definitely didn't offer fashion merchandising, but their history department was stellar. 

Anyway, every time I feel lost or overwhelmed by my major and find myself pouring over runway pictures and putting together outfits to escape it all my mind starts to second guess my high school decisions... 

Friday night Hermione, Hannah, and I had a girls night. On the way home Hannah started confessing her fear that her choice of major just wasn't right for her and I happily commiserated with her. It was fantastic to know I wasn't the only one. Hermione on the other hand, when pressed, said she had absolutely no doubts, that it was her fate to teach math, no questions about it. Her certainty is something I've always been jealous of, I'm almost never certain of anything... But at least Hannah is in the same boat : )

Anyway, I have a feeling I'll be posting a lot of fashiony blogs this semester... It's the first week and it's already kicking my ass!

Yeah I'm Procrastinating Today. Can You Tell?

This picture of Taylor Swift and Miley Cyrus promoting their duet for the tonight's Grammy's make me sad. 

Miley Cyrus is t-r-o-u-b-l-e. Taylor Swift is not. She is a good girl, one of the few that are left. Boo to Miley Cyrus. I think this next picture perfectly illustrates my point. 

Stay away from her!!

This is What I Want to Wear Tomorrow

Accesorized smartly with...

Jewelry is by this fantastic Chicago based jewelry designer, Jess L.C., that I'm currently loving. Pictures link to her Web Site. 

All clothes by, you guessed it, Forever 21 : )

I'm Not at all Working on It...

I'm slowly trying to ease myself back in to Photo Shop. I learned in high school on a PC (pooh pooh) and so since my switch to all things Apple I have been unable to use it. Recently I purchased Photo Shop for Mac but I just haven't been able to muster the patience to delve back in. However today, due to severe procrastination, I discovered that they are reasonably similar! And so I share with you my first cleaned up picture!

Before

After

Just enough difference to make it worth it! 

Now I guess I should write my papers...

I'm Working On It

I'm really working on the Germany pictures thing, and one day I will in fact write down every little memory that's important to me (after all it is my blog) even if they aren't actually important or even interesting, but they will be written down on this blog. One day I will get to it. I promise. Really, I have to, because otherwise I will forget. I forget a lot of important things, I never forget the things that are important to me, but I have found that the things that are important to me generally do not carry the same value with others. For example, I loaded some of my favorite pictures of my trip to my Flickr account (the slideshow on the left will link to it). While they are certainly my favorite pictures, they are not others' favorites. They are too close up, many are taken looking directly into the sun, they don't give a good perspective of where I was. But they are exactly how I remember the trip. I remember getting as close as I could to everything and soaking in the details close up and I remember looking into the sun and seeing things mapped out in black against a brilliant light. I don't remember detail by detail what Old Town Square in Praha looked like, but I do remember looking up into the cloudy skies and seeing a beige and grey building towering over my head and feeling it. Feeling the beauty and the age of the city. 

The large cityscapes don't get me, but a close up of bright persimmon stucco does it for me every time. 

Anyway, just trust that in time I will get around to doing it all. In the meantime however I have 16 pages to right about my trip in order to receive credit for going on it... Wish me luck!

If Only

It's 6:00 in the morning and my head thinks is should be 1 in the afternoon.

My stomach thinks it should be searching for a cheap and authentic place to have lunch, not breakfast. 

My heart is wondering why the beau and my friends aren't here with me. 

And my feet are wondering why they are tucked in bed next to a sleeping dog and not traveling over cobblestones in Prague. 

Le sigh.

Off to Europe with the Beau

How lovely is that title? I suppose it's only part of the truth but it just sounded so good, like I'm a seasoned world traveler and I'm off for a weekend trip of martinis and bellinis in the French Riviera with my current love...

Anyway, back to earth. 

So it's about 2 in the morning and I should really be in bed but I promised myself I would blog since I don't know the next time I'll be able to... Tomorrow I leave with a bunch of other MC students and one of my fave profs to go to Germany, Austria, Hungary, Slovakia, and the Czech Republic. 

I wish I could explain how badly I have always wanted to go to Europe. I mean, I wanted to go to Europe when all the other little girls wanted to be ballerinas (maybe that's because I got to be one and I didn't think it was so hot). I wanted Europe when the other girls wanted NSYNC. I wanted Europe when other girls were partying, when they were looking at colleges, all of it. I could look at every single list of goals for my life that I have ever made and I promise you that every single one will mention Europe, and not in a frivolous way like I just felt they would have great beaches, but in an intensely serious way. 

But even my optimistic little self didn't really feel it would happen. It was just something far off, something to dream about. And even though I catch my plane tomorrow at 3:15 it still doesn't feel like its going to happen. I mean that's like 12 hours away... 

But I have packed and weighed my bags. I printed out all the conversion tables and Mod Podged them to card-stock, organized by colors assigned to each country of course. I obsessed over which shoes to bring, how many pairs of jeans, how many T-Shirts. I sacrificed my MC hoodie because it took up too much room. I cut down on the books (only one and it's killing me...). I packed up my adapter and signed my passport and it should be kicking in by now but it's not. 

I had a very hard time cutting down on the clothes. I think a big portion of that is due to the fact that the BF will be joining me on this trip : ) How fantastic is that? How many people get to go to Europe with their college sweetheart?? Not a whole heck of a lot I'd imagine. However, even though we've been together for bordering on two and a half years, his being there makes me really want to pack lots of clothes... 

Well this post was fairly erratic but as it's about 2:20 now what can you expect really? Time to wrap it up. I'm off to Germany tomorrow and you better believe I will be coming back with thousands of pictures and many stories. I'm bringing my lovely little Mac with because I just couldn't bear to be parted from him so I plan on making an honest effort to blog. Plus if I don't write my adventures down immediately I will probably forget them... 

So auf wiedersehen my lovely friends! I'm done with America and off to conquer a new continent!

My New Year's Goals

This morning, as I made my daily perusal of my favorite blogs, I noticed that each and every one of them contained a list of goals for the new year. I've never really been into celebrating New Year's or making New Year's Resolutions, but perhaps this year I'll give it a try. Just don't seriously hold me to them...

1.   Work out more

2.   Judge even less, I try really hard on that one all the time, but alas I fail sometimes...

3.   This summer try to be the absolute best camp counselor I can, those kids sure do try to be the best kids they can so I owe them that much at least! Except maybe the poopers...

4.   Get everything I can out of my trip to Europe. Try new things, keep an open mind, loose inhibitions, completely immerse myself in absolutely everything European, and refuse to give up any opportunity because I might loose sleep.

5.   Be a better friend, be there for people

6.   Force my hair to return to a normal color, ONE color... Post on that later...

7.   Buy at least ONE successful gift for the BF...

8.   Make a really great CD/playlist of songs that make me feel fantastic

  Note to self: Foy Vance, Homebird will be track numero uno

9.   Be a better Christian

10. Read the Screwtape Letters

11. Take Wicket for lots of walks

12. Go to new places with the BF

  -Chicago at top of list, it's certainly not new to us, but it is well loved!

13. Read for fun throughout the school year as well as for school

14. Spend more time with my grandparents

15. Do a hardcore cleaning of the upstairs, we are talking intense makeover.

I Capture the Castle

I have just finished a book that I've wanted to finish for months. For almost a year now every time I walked into a Barnes and Noble a book covered with a soft green pattern of flowers and umbrellas has caught my eye. I read the back of the book each time and forgot what it said each time, remembering only that it had captured me in an odd way. Last week I had a mind to buy it but as I had never paid attention to the author and didn't even know the title I quickly gave up the search, settling instead for the Screwtape Letters, (C.S. Lewis is something of a hero of mine). As I was walking to pay that soft green caught the corner of my eye and it's just as captivating as I had hoped it would be. 

I wound myself into Cassandra and Rose, Simon and Neil, and beautiful Stephen as well until I felt like our fates were aligned, like I knew them and was living life with them. I felt their successes, their failures, and their confusions, especially their confusions. Last night I got to the point where I had 50 pages left so I knew today was the day to end it all. But for every book I finish, it must be done in solitude and on a full stomach, especially if it is filled with some sort of chocolate or ice cream treat. So this evening I searched for a place to finish. Settling on my bed I made myself some peppermint ice cream, grabbed my book, and curled into my favorite blanket. But it didn't last. My family chose that moment to congregate in the kitchen which is located at the bottom of the stairs, my room is located at the top and the stairwell seems to act as a funnel and a magnifier all at once. My book, I'm sorry to say, was not finished in peace. Although my stomach was pleasingly full the book ended in a flurry of reread paragraphs and skimming. And to top it off the ending was inconclusive. My dear Cassandra's problems were not solved and she was set to face an English winter without the man she loved and without a clear plan. But then I thought about it. Cassandra was hardly 18 and even though 18 was much older in the 30s than it is now, I still think it would be an awful shame if all ones problems were solved by 18. I have to say the best portions of my life so far happened after 18 and although it it troublesome to not know how life will turn out I also think it would be quite boring if one did know. Either way, now I feel the book ended in the only way that wouldn't have severely disappointed me. It is a lovely book and I highly recommend it. Oh and to top it off, the author, Dodie Smith, also wrote 101 Dalmatians!